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Unique Funny Birthday Cards from NobleWorks

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"Live it up! You're only middle-aged once!" - Martin Luther King, Jr. Just kidding. That's a funny quote that graces the cover of one of our hilarious birthday cards made by Ephemera. But seriously, did you know that some of the great thinkers of modern history said some pretty spectacular things about birthdays? This long list includes birthday quotes funny enough to scribble inside any birthday card, so you can let philosophers, politicians and celebrities do the talking for you. Celebrate your loved one's birthday and quote all the greats. That way you can completely justify the overindulgence you're about to take part in.

Find a birthday quote with humor, sentimentality and celebration rolled into one, like this fantastic quote from Frank Sinatra: "May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be

mine." What a charmer he was. How about some 50th birthday famous quotes by Muhammad Ali? Cassius Clay himself said, "A man who views the world the same at 50 as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life." Other entertainers on this list of birthday quotes include Lucille Ball, Johnny Carson and George Harrison. Choice words by William Shakespeare, Robert Browning, Oscar Wilde and Mark Twain are also here, so you can certainly find a funny birthday quote to write inside a card for all your loved ones.

Here at NobleWorks Cards, we offer an unbeatable selection of hilarious, clever, irreverent and thoughtful birthday cards to honor all your aging amigos. Plus, all of our cards are printed in the U.S. on eco-friendly paper and ship free straight to your doorstep, so you get an environmentally friendly, budget-friendly and humor-friendly card for everyone on your list. The famous birthday quotes in our cards will inspire you with some additional funny things to write on a birthday as a greeting. Our Mark Twain birthday quote would serve equally well as an inscription on a Father's Day card as a birthday card, given his wry observation on the all-knowingness of youth and the wisdom of age. Whether you're shopping for a card for your dad, your mom, a sibling or anyone else you'd like to surprise with a dash of wit, with all of our famously funny birthday quotes, including Mark Twain quotes, birthdays will be better for everyone on your birthday card list.

Famous, Funny Birthday Quotes

Muhammad Ali

"A man who views the world the same at 50 as he did at 20 has wasted 30 years of his life."

Kitty Collins

"Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life."

George Harrison

"All the world is a birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much."


"Artificial intelligence is a wonderful thing. I told my computer that today is my birthday, and it said that I need an upgrade."

Norman Wisdom

"As you get older, three things happen: The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two."

Andre Gide

"At times is it seems that I am living my life backward, and that at the approach of old age my real youth will begin. My soul was born covered with wrinkles. Wrinkles my ancestors and parents most assiduously put there and that I had the greatest trouble removing."

Greg Evans

"Birthday is a salty word if you're not a fan of cake and ice cream."


"Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake."


"Few women admit their age. Few men act theirs."

John Glenn

"For all the advances in medicine, there is still no cure for the common birthday."

Robert Browning

"Grow old along with me; the best is yet to be."

William Shakespeare

"How far that little candle throws his beams!"

Ellen Glasgow

"It is lovely, when I forget all birthdays, including my own, to find that somebody remembers me."

Mark Twain

"Life would be infinitely better if we could be born at the age of 80 and gradually approach 18."

Frank Sinatra

"May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine."

Robert Lynd

"Most of us can remember a time when a birthday - especially if it was one's own - brightened the world as if a second sun has risen."

Thomas Moore

"My birthday! What a different sound that word had in my youthful ear."

Malcolm Forbes

"Old age is not for sissies."

Oscar Wilde

"One should never trust a woman who tells her real age. A woman who would tell one that would tell anything."

Jean Ritcher

"Our birthdays are feathers in the broad wing of time."

Martin Buxbaum

"Some people, no matter how old they get, never lose their beauty they merely move it from their faces into their hearts."

Audrey Hepburn

"Success is like reaching an important birthday and finding you're exactly the same."

Elizabeth Staton

"The heyday of a woman's life is the shady side of 50."

Oscar Wilde

"The old believe everything; the middle aged suspect everything: the young know everything."

Lucille Ball

"The secret to staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age."

Johnny Carson

"The worst gift is a fruitcake. There is only one fruitcake in the entire world, and people keep sending it to each other."

Franklin Adams

"There must be a day or two in a man's life when he is the precise age for something important."

William Shakespeare

"There was a star dance, and under that was I born."

Robert Frost

"Time and tide wait for no man, but time always stands still for a woman of 30."

William Shakespeare

"To me, fair friend, you never can be old. For as you were when first your eye I eyed, such seems your beauty still."

Lucy Larcom

"Whatever with the past has gone, the best is always yet to come."

Mark Twain

"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years."


"Youth is the best time to be rich and the best time to be poor."