Greeting  cards online cart icon by NobleWorks
NOTICE: Cards ordered for Halloween will not be delivered in time for the holiday.

Toilet Paper Birthday Cards

We ship free! Allow 3-4 business days for printing.


One of the more unusual, and utterly annoying, side effects of the coronavirus pandemic was that toilet paper suddenly became in short supply. For some totally inexplicable and purely irrational reason, rather than stocking up on prescription drugs, oranges and lemons, all the pornography needed to get through a contact-less long-haul lockdown, people panicked and pillaged TP from the grocery, hardware and convenience store shelves. Toilet paper all-butt disappeared in the sheety frenzy, resulting in soiled situations, dirty bottoms and some damn Birthday cards. Such as the funny cardboard missives of toilet bowl humor on display - and actual sale! - here.

At NobleWorks, we always say if you can't laugh at a deadly global virus and the ensuing wipe-out chaos, then what the hell can you laugh at!? Hilarity can be found in the filthiest places, after all, so when COVID-19 hit the bathrooms and washrooms of the nation and world hard, we pinned up our sleeves, got our hands and our minds dirty, and spun out the hysterical, joyous, joke greeting cards you see here, so that all the Birthday boys and girls could still have a F'ing good time on their big special day. Wine, whine, dogs, archaeologists, coffee, healthcare workers and bags and bags of precious toilet paper are front, center and rear on these gut and gag-busting greetings. It's good, cleaning, white and brown humor, yes sh@t! And if those B-Day celebrants you know are still in short-supply of the butt sanitizer, then hey, the hand-sized flexible notecards themselves can double as Well, even we won't go (down around) there. Suffice it to say, that when you paper some friend's, relative's or coworker's party with any of these mirthful greeting cards, there won't be a dry eye or a wet bum in the happy house.
free shipping
Legal Stuff