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Whether you enjoy your humor low-brow or high-brow, you'll love the zany contemporary-flavored satire of Scott Metzger. Do you ever wonder what the animals are talking about all day long while we're at work? Wonder no longer! Metzger has been a professional cartoonist based in San Francisco since 1996. His artistic creations have appeared in Funny Times Magazine, and two of his comic strips involve a talking pine tree and a dim-witted bison, so that should give you some idea of what this guy is about. He also claimed to be the cartoonist for a syphilis prevention campaign called "Healthy Penis," sponsored by San Francisco's Department of Public Health. We had to look that one up, and apparently it's true. After that, it should be no surprise to see his edgy humor cards for various occasions, such as Santa's reindeer joking about his weight on Facebook, a potato peeing into leek soup (get it?), former employees complaining about Santa's workshop on Yelp! and disgruntled pets bitching (again on Facebook, where else?) about what their owners got them for Christmas. Happy holidays!