Quotes About Birthdays, Famous Quotes And Funny Sayings

“If you pick up a starving dog and make him prosperous he will not bite you. This is the principal difference between a dog and man.” ― Mark Twain

“Meow” means “woof” in cat.” ― George Carlin

“Owners of dogs will have noticed that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they will think you are god. Whereas owners of cats are compelled to realize that, if you provide them with food and water and shelter and affection, they draw the conclusion that they are gods.” ― Christopher Hitchens,

“Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read.” ― Groucho Marx

“Happiness is a warm puppy.” ― Charles M. Schulz

“Dogs never bite me. Just humans.” ― Marilyn Monroe

“Dogs are our link to paradise. They don't know evil or jealousy or discontent. To sit with a dog on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring--it was peace.” ― Milan Kundera

“I am fond of pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals.” ― Winston Churchill

“If animals could speak, the dog would be a blundering outspoken fellow; but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much.” ― Mark Twain

“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.” ― Josh Billings

“Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.” ― Mark Twain

“If there are no dogs in Heaven, then when I die I want to go where they went.” ― Will Rogers

“A bone to the dog is not charity. Charity is the bone shared with the dog, when you are just as hungry as the dog.” ― Jack London

“All his life he tried to be a good person. Many times, however, he failed.
For after all, he was only human. He wasn't a dog.” ― Charles M. Schulz

“The dog is a gentleman; I hope to go to his heaven not man's.” ― Mark Twain

"You get someone who stays up all night torturing himself mentally over the question of whether or not there's a dog.” ― David Foster Wallace,

“You think those dogs will not be in heaven! I tell you they will be there long before any of us.”― Robert Louis Stevenson

“If you don't own a dog, at least one, there is not necessarily anything wrong with you, but there may be something wrong with your life.” ― Roger Caras

“Dogs have given us their absolute all. We are the center of their universe. We are the focus of their love and faith and trust. They serve us in return for scraps. It is without a doubt the best deal man has ever made. ” ― Roger Caras

“Just give me a comfortable couch, a dog, a good book, and a woman. Then if you can get the dog to go somewhere and read the book, I might have a little fun.” ― Groucho Marx

“The only creatures that are evolved enough to convey pure love are dogs and infants.” ― Johnny Depp

“Petting, scratching, and cuddling a dog could be as soothing to the mind and heart as deep meditation and almost as good for the soul as prayer.” ― Dean Koontz

“The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs.” ― Charles de Gaulle

“Dogs feel very strongly that they should always go with you in the car, in case the need should arise for them to bark violently at nothing right in your ear.” ― Dave Barry

“The more boys I meet the more I love my dog.” ― Carrie Underwood

“If a dog will not come to you after having looked you in the face, you should go home and examine your conscience.” ― Woodrow Wilson

“My girlfriend bought me a collared shirt for my birthday, mainly so I don’t get too far ahead of her when she takes me for a walk.” ― Jarod Kintz