are special birthdays. They require special birthday cards.
It various from culture to culture, but the United States has a few
18 Eighteenth birthday. You’re finally adult…kind of. Your
18th birthday is your first step into adulthood and a perfect time
for your first hilarious dirty card. It’s time to rejoice, say goodbye to your
childhood and pretend to be mature. Or you can simply categorize your toy
collection as a “Collector Items,” and no one will question you. Yes, it really
21 Twenty-first birthday. You made it past 18 in one piece,
hopefully, and now you can finally try that alcohol stuff that was forbidden.
What? You tried it before? How? Well, we won’t tell anyone. Someone might even
send you a naughty card.
25 Twenty-fifth birthday. It seems 25 is the new
quarter-life crisis. You’re just a few years from 30, and didn’t someone say
not to trust anyone over 30? Of course, whoever said that is much older than 30
now and we can’t trust the source of this quote.
30 Thirtieth birthday. You’re no longer a young adult.
You’re just a plain old fart now. Remember, 30 is the new 20! Especially if
math isn’t your strong suit. It is All downhill from hear my man.
40 Fortieth birthday. You’re now certifiably old, and
hopefully mature adult. You’re expected to have that whole marriage, children,
house, and career thing down. If not, maybe it’s time for a vacation to
celebrate your freedom and rub your carefree life in your friends’ faces as
they can’t have fun with all those other responsibilities tying them down, or
alternatively a wacky funny card might be all that is needed.
50 Fiftieth birthday. If you live to be 100, you’re half way
through your life. If you’re a vampire, then it’s all good. Just keep the guns
loaded for the zombie apocalypse.
60 Sixtieth birthday. This is similar to turning 50, only
now you can give your grandchildren ugly knit sweaters on Christmas when all
they wanted was the newest video game. I’m pretty sure it’s an unsaid
prerequisite of being 60.
100 Hundredth birthday. Wow. You’re amazing. You are now
definitely an old fart. You’ve seen a century, and you can remember some of
your great-grandchildren’s names, but not that second-to-last one. He’s kind of